Dear Roommate

Dear roommate,

As I right this, you are in the shower, your music in your room is louder than mine in my room, you've left all the lights on, we only have on bathroom, and I really have to pee.

I hear you're pitter patter back and forth between the hall; I understand you are getting ready. However, you have been getting ready for the last 1 hour and 26 minutes and during that time, I've had to pee. That urge is getting considerably worse. With this letter, I am begging of you to allow me some relief.

Please step out of the bath. Please gather the necessary items and do your hair and make-up in your room. Please allow me a few brief seconds in our shared bath to go. I must so bad and quite honestly, I'm urging on can't hold it anymore!

I apologize for the grotesque nature of this text. I simply don't think you can hear me calling your name over your MTv and radio. Also, the squatting dance was not my impersonation of Michael Jackson, it was me trying to ask for permission to enter the bathroom. I am simply beginning to have much difficulty and discomfort; please! please! allow me just a few brief minutes of this huge chunk of time you need to get ready!

Thank you, now get out of my way!

Sincerely,

Your roommate

PS - I'm going to sit on your bed until you're done :)