Where's my heart rate?

Fall Break.

W00t!

How it's spent? Last night, had a party to shoot. Started off pretty easy, then turned challenging when it moved indoors and it was dark and I couldn't see to manually focus the lens. The camera couldn't see to automatically focus, either. I had a lot of hit and misses. Now I know where I need to work on my skills. Today, I have another shoot, hence the Senior portrait rant earlier. Then it's back to work to record weekend programming and remotes. Then it's me, myself, and movies! Maybe a book. Or maybe I'll be responsible and see what schoolwork I can catch up on.

I'm kind of glad to have a little time to myself. It's been really hectic lately. The marathon of tests I had the last two weeks, work, shoots, birthday parties, games, school, and the list goes on and on and on... pant pant pant It's insane! Fortunately, all the hard work and effort is paying off. Aced my Stats test, 96 on Micro, 89 on CS, and 85 on Anthro. I survived!

And the Sitar was good!

Tomorrow, we're celebrating my nephew's 2nd birthday! He's such a big man! Scratch free time activities, I have to make A's and my Halloween costumes for party...

The Gift

Me: Hey, Mum, guess what!

Mum: Hey, Stepper, what's up?

Me: I just saved a ton of money on my textbooks!

Mum: Really? How'd you do that?

Me: I didn't buy them from the University and rented two. I was supposed to pay nearly $600, saved over $300. I only spent $240 on the books I need this semester! I'm so excited!

Mum: That's great! Way to go! Guess what!

Me: Uhh.. what?

Mum: G got you something.

Me thinking: My stepdad bought me something?

Me: G bought me something?

Mum: Yeah! A taser!

Me: A taser? I'm confused.

Mum: Yeah! He got me one and thought it would be a good idea to get you one, too. Said he was worried about you walking around town by yourself!

Me: Mum, I don't know how to use a taser.

Mum: It's easy. Just point and touch. Skin, preferably.

Me: Uhhh.... Thanks! I can't wait to not have to use it! I can't wait to play with it!

Snow Angels

It's snowing outside.

I live in Alabama. That means the entire state's been shut down for flurries.

I will admit though, there is a lot of snow coming down. It's just not sticking very well. It will probably be something of more concern once the roads start to freeze over tonight. That will be great for me seeing as work hasn't notified me of ANY weather plans. Love corporate America.

It's actually kind of nice to wake up and have a lazy day, listening to all the neighbors waking up and playing in the snow. There are sounds of spontaneously laughter and splatters of snow on nylon jackets outside my window. Don't have too much fun out there, guys! This morning, it was as quiet as a mouse outside. Not a peep. The snow was resting gently and collecting slowly in the grass. It would fall in the most lazy of ways to the ground, hypnotizing me as I sipped my coffee.

I feel like a bum. I haven't accomplished much with this time. However, I've actually done a lot. Oxymoron of the day. Just finishing up last minute Valentine's and playing with new software to pass the time. I'm not going anywhere if I don't have to today. It's too cold, it's too wet, and I'm comfortable right where I am.

I'm hoping I don't get snowed in this Valentine's Day weekend. I'm very excited and curious about my Valentine's gift...my curiosity is quite piqued. All I have is a riddle. I like surprises. Always making me think. If you surprise me before I figure this out, you're good. Not many people surprise me - you know why. I don't want anything to spoil tomorrow. He had so much excitement in his eyes when he was teasing me with our mystery plans. I'm excited to find out! I'll just be happy to get to spend some uninterrupted time with him - that time that seems to tick so slowly when we're together and yet I still hate it when it comes to an end.

Then Sunday, I'm going home for the day. I get to see the two other young men in my life and give them their Valentine's from their favorite Aunt.

See, this stupid snow, while peaceful today, messes up a lot of my plans!

Go away, Snow!!

Fireworks

What a crazy week and weekend it's been!! Hope everyone had a great fourth! Mine was spent on the lake with all of my friends and their children - food and beer included. It was awesome! Until I lost my house keys!! That didn't ruin my weekend, though! The fireworks were great, the water was awesome and I had a blast! Thanks to Dee Ann for having us all over!!

Met a couple of potential roommates as well this weekend. Oh the decisions I will have to make -- but more on that later!!

I have come to a conclusion that I need a list! I have attracted too many weirdos. I'm just a magnet for them. So I'm going to make a list - a big, long, picky list of requirements that a guy has to meet before I can go out on a date with him. Certainly that should nip some of this in the bud!!

Cup of decaf

Some moments in life I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world.

I've been thinking over this past year, as I'm sure a lot of other people have as well, considering the time of year. There are so many things in life that I am grateful for this year and many other times over the past year have broken my heart.

I hate to get all sappy but I'm nostalgic right now. Get over it and go to the next post if you don't like it.

I can't look back at 2008 and say that I've accomplished everything that I've wanted to accomplish. I can't look back and say, "I'm proud of myself for sticking to every resolution," especially since I didn't have any resolutions and I usually don't make any. Why start on January 1 when you can start on December 31? I'll end 2008 with about the same amount of money in my pocket as I started, still childless (with the exception of Lucy and my husband), I still don't have the perfect body and I moved again, something I swore I wouldn't do in 2008.

I can look back and say that I loved my grandmother dearly, and I hope she knew just how much before she passed away. I can say that Wayne was one of the most dear friends I'll ever have and that I'll miss him forever. I can fill my heart almost explode with the amount of love I have for those two people despite that holes that are left from their departures.

I can look back and appreciate every moment I had with my family members over this past holiday season. There were new faces to cuddle, new bonds and more laughs shared. I can honestly say that this was the first Christmas that I really sat back and let all the love and laughter really sink in while I looked at my family and thought of how much each member meant to me.

I can take what I've learned in 2008 and head into the new year more readily armed for what life hands me in the next 365 days. I know that there will be in the inevitable rough time, the challenge. But I'll gladly take and learn from those if each one of them helps me appreciate, even more, the people and things I already have in my life.

It's when you can truly appreciate the good that the bad finally gets outweighed.

The Gift

We had three Christmas parties Thursday. Trey and I were on the road all day long. We spent the night in Birmingham at his parents house and left Tuscaloosa just in time to miss the tornado warnings Wednesday night. From the alarm sound, it was "Go" the rest of the day. Our only alone time was in the car laughing at our families before hitting the next party.

We left my mother's house around 2:30 and headed to Stephen's apartment to eat some more. I was so tired of eating and really getting sleepy, plus, I'd had a few glasses of wine; I was feeling very relaxed. I handed Trey the keys to my car and laid my head back on the head rest and lowered my eye lids while he made the drive to Shelby County. Somewhere along the interstate, Trey mentioned having one more Christmas gift.

"But I thought we'd already exchanged our gifts earlier this month!," I protested. "I didn't get you anything else!"

"Oh it's nothing major, it's at Stephen's," he responded.

What the hell did you get me? You weren't supposed to! How did you spend money without me seeing it missing in the checking account? I wondered quietly.

"I got you those tickets to go see that Wizard of Oz thingy show -"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWicked!!!EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!" I screamed, "I'M GOING TO SEE WICKED!!!!!?"

Trey put a finger in his ear and laughed, "Yes, you're going to see Wicked."

More screaming. Actually, I think I screamed like a teenage girl seeing David Cassidy or the Beatles all the to Stephen's.

"I'M GOING TO SEE WICKED! I'M GOING TO SEE WICKED!," I continued, "Where are we sitting? Are we sitting where Stephen thought he'd get the tickets?"

"I don't know; I think it's the middle section."

"The mezzanine?"

"Yeah, I think so."

I don't care! I'M GOING TO SEE WICKED!!

We got to Stephens a few minutes later and I was still so giddy, I was singing.

Apparently, Stephen had a plan, though, "Why did you tell her? I had it all planned out!"

"I'll act surprised!" I reassured him, "I can fake it!"

I don't think it assured Stephen well enough. I tried to act surprised anyway when I opened the gift and didn't fake anything at all when I read where we were sitting.

ROW D ORCHESTRA

no way...

"Third row???"

"Yup!"

"I'M GOING TO SEE WICKED ON THE THIRD ROW!" the poor neighbors. I just kept screaming!!

#1 Fan

Text message from Stephen: Hear about Wicked?

Me: What about? Coming to Bham!!!!! Make trey get tickets!!! I want to go sooooo bad!!!

S: I can get tickets now

Me: What????? How much??

S: I think 30 thru 78 this is a presale too could get some really good seats!

Me: I can't say yes to that! I've got my half marathon to register for this month! Early Christmas present?

S: What r u asking me? half marathon?

Me: I'm running in a half marathon and I have to regsiter this month. Costs money. How long do we have for presale?

S: I don't know! think [Trey] would go? i was actually thinking of getting tickets

Me: All I know is that I'm going if I have to sneak in!!

Conversation with Trey:

"Hey, baby," stay sweet! "What are you doing??"

"Working. Just got off the phone with a client."

"Oh, that's great! I'm glad! Busy day?"

"Yes, busy." He knows somethings up! Dammit!

"I talked to Stephen just now." Just keep smiling!

"Oh yeah? What'd he say?" He knows I'm about to ask for something...

"Oh, that he can get presale tickets to Wicked now and I really want to go, I hear it's awesome, I really want to go see it -"

"No."

"But it's WICKED!"

"What's Wicked?"

"It's the Wizard of Oz. On. Broadway." duh!

"How much?" shit!

"I don't know," 'attagirl! Keep smiling! "Talk to Stephen! I don't know how he's got the connection or how long we have. All I know is there is no "NO" to Wicked."

"When is it?"

"April."

"Can it wait?"

"There. is. no. "NO." to. Wicked."

When you give yourself lemons and you can't drink the lemonade...

Training is hard. It's very hard work.

When I first started talking about doing this half-marathon with my husband, he said, "Whatever." I tried to explain to him how much I was going to need his support, I knew in the back of my head that this would be hard. Little did I know how hard this really was going to be!

When you think of training to run, you think, "Oh, it's just running! You add miles everyday! You'll get conditioned to running that far!"

The thing is, it's not just the running. I'm not a very fast runner, never have been and don't really care if I ever become one. I just enjoy running. It's not just being conditioned to running miles and miles at a time. My body will get there no matter how hard I have to push myself! There are other parts to this training.

Every morning, I wake up at 5:00 am, get up at 5:15, dress and head to the gym. I run my assignment and then circuit train for at least another 30-45 minutes. In total, I'm working out almost 2 hours straight a day.

Then there is the wear and tear on my body. My ankle has a very mild sprain . It's not inhibiting me but it is annoying. When I get home at night, it's very sore, especially if I stand flat-footed. I have to be super-careful when I walk and stand as I don't want to get a serious injury. The blame for that is the bad shoes I was wearing. Not only did I get the sore ankle, I also have quarter-sized blisters on my feet still healing up. Fortunately, those don't hurt anymore! Thank God for my new shoes!

Now to the mental portion of this training. I am on a treadmill, staring at a monitor telling me how far I've run while I, the OCD one, start counting backwards to see how much further I have to go! After twenty minutes of this, my mind is bored and I need something else for my gaze. Thing is, when I look straight ahead, there is a clock straight directly in my line of site like a bull's eye. The TVs in the cardio theatre, as wonderful as they are for helping me zone out, are fixed from the ceiling, so I have to crane my neck slightly upward to see them. Not always the most comfortable stance while running. So to solve a few of these problems as best I know how, I take a magazine and place it over the monitor and turn my iPod up as loud as I can stand it. That lasts until my ears get so sweaty the earphones won't stay in anymore. I have to go get some more ear buds! I'm literally pushing myself through some of these long runs. It's not fun when you're bored.

Last on this list, and most certainly not least, is my diet. Any trainer will tell you that it doesn't matter how much work you do in the gym, how much activity you get, how many calories you burn; none of the effort is worth it if you don't eat right. I've had to change my diet a bit and it's very frustrating. I feel like I don't know what's OK to eat anymore! Used to be easy: no breads unless wheat, sweet potatoes, lean proteins, egg yolks were OK, protein, protein, protein! I could eat a few sweets in moderation, and I mean moderation! I could enjoy my breakfast of eggs, bacon and grits from the Texaco station!

Now? Egg whites, carbs closer to long run days, protein shakes after runs (and these protein shakes are N.A.S.T.Y!), bananas (no trots, please!), oranges for the vitamin C, supplements for more fat loss. Chicken on a salad is OK, but I really need to be eating the dressings I can't stand, like vinaigrette's! Tuna for more protein. Flavorless, bland food.

I have lean up quick so I don't have to run with so much weight on me in February! I'm chunky! I'm strong, but I'm chunky! - And I have to lose it! It's so hard to eat right when you're hungry all the time! I feel like a weight trainer that's allowed to eat carbs.

Let's just top that off with Ed's mama baking brownies and bringing them to the dealership. The delicious, moist, chocolate treat is oh so good. Jessica, I hoped you really enjoyed them. The sweet tarts in my pocket that I want to choke down but can't. I didn't buy them, so don't be disappointed. I only had, maybe, 4 of them. Brooke didn't like them and gave them to me. I love sour! I'm sticking them in my desk drawer as a reward after race day! And never forget that my Reese's Pieces are sitting in a plastic container in the storage closet waiting for me to drop my $.50 in the change box so I can claim them as mine. Oh...so tempting...

Not all of my days are hard. I have moments like this morning, when my easy run felt super easy. It was one of those moments where a week ago, I had to push myself. I think of how hard it was and feel so proud to see that it's getting easier and easier the harder I work. I have days where I'm not hungry every minute of every day. That's not today, by the way! I am hearing more people compliment me on how much better I'm starting to look, how they can tell I'm losing weight. I'm hearing people say they wished they could try to do what I'm doing. Little do they know that I wish they would so I wouldn't be so alone in this!

So, no, not every day is a hard day. But the harder days are getting closer and closer together. That's why I when I talked to Trey about this, I wanted him to understand why this was so important, so big, so far-reaching. I wanted him to understand this, I wanted my friends to understand, I wanted my family to understand. Its imperative to understand in order to support. I'm so grateful that I have my husband, friends and family and their support. That doesn't mean you can eat Ed's Mama's brownies in front of me.

If you wondered why this was such a big deal before, now I hope you understand, too, that this is foremost the most challenging thing I've ever done. I believe in myself that I can finish this but I also have to know that I have my friends and family cheering me along as I go.

The Great Thanksgiving

Let's face it. My cooking skills have never been steller. I think that's why Mum gave me the "appetizers" category this year; something I can't screw up (but I can burn water!).

This morning, I got up at the crack of dawn to start my Thanksgiving. I was excited to get to participate in the cooking festivities this year. So I got showered and dressed and headed to the kitchen. I can't cook but I never said that I don't like to pretend!

This morning, I've made meatballs (actually something Trey said he was going to make) and chicken wrapped in bacon and dredged in brown sugar and spice. Ooohh those loook sooo goood!! Thank you, Paula Dean!!! They are baking right now. The meatballs are ready to be eaten.

Trey has made his peanut butter balls. AKA Recipe for Weight Gain - Jenny Craig's favorite!

I made a dip, a bacon chedder dip. I bought some Triscuits to go with them and have been fighting to keep my husband away from the box all week long! I'm thankful it's Thanksgiving so that he can eat them now!

I may not can cook but in my land of pretend, all of the food sounds delicious! I can't wait to try it!

Now, Trey is getting ready, I'm waiting for the chicken to finish and then we are headed to my hometown to eat at my Mum's house. I'm never gonna lose enough weight for this half-marathon now!!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Enjoy every bite you eat today and worry about it later!!

Food...and boys at the daycare

Tuscaloosa Hyundai had its annual Thanksgiving Day dinner today, complete with turkey, dressing, gravy, cranberry sauce, rolls, sweet potatoe casserole, green bean casserole, mac and cheese, crockpot mac and cheese, a cake that was to D.I.E. for and pumpkin pie - Oh it was all so good! I was in food heaven!! My favorites were the chocolate cake and Brooke's crockpot mac and cheese.

Let me explain something: I am the only female on the sales staff. There are ten other people besides me in my department. So that's ten people with XY chromosomes. Needless to say, I feel like a maid, a mother and a sister all at the same time.

Right now, I feel like I'm a teacher in preschool after all these guys ate their lunch! They are running around pulling pranks, touching everything on my desk while I'm working, being loud and obnoxious.

I feel like I need a whistle to call everybody to order! When will the sugar from all the carbs expire so they all crash??

The Great Move

So, as far as I'm concerned, the actual moving of inanimate objects is completed pertaining to Mission Palisades 2008. Hallelujah!

I never want to move again. I really want to leave it at that. I've told you a little of what happened during the move but I really don't have enough medication to relive it again to tell you the story. Ha ha! Just joking! I really don't want to re-tell my account of our move on Saturday and Sunday because I don't want to say anything I'll come to regret later. I hope you'll understand.

Just understand that I am so thankful to have everything under one roof again, including Lucy, whom missed two nights of sleep with me! My poor baby! In fact, she was so ready to go home, she packed herself up for us!

I want to apologize for all the whining I've done about this move. It's not your fault, I should keep my mouth shut. I just think it makes for good story telling. But my attitude has been shit during this move and I don't think I should think like that. I like to try to be the happy, positive one. The one who always sees the coffee cup half full. I like feeling productive, animated and efficacious.

That being said, I am actually looking forward to the unpacking/organizing as a therapeutic lagniappe to myself. I will have all items unpacked by Friday. I WILL have all items unpacked by Friday!

Plus, Wednesday is our Thanksgiving dinner at the dealership. I'm going to make - I mean Trey is going to make sweet potatoe casserole with marshmellows on top! I love sweet potatoe casserole! Plus I/he gets to use the mixer Mum gave me a few years ago. I've never had anything to use it for and now I do - mean Trey does! OK, so I'm "helping" him make it. But don't tell anyone because no one will eat my cooking after I set the kitchen on fire the second time. But I like learning to cook, being in the kitchen has it's own therapeutic touch.

And tomorrow, I promise, I'm getting back in the gym. I swear my attitude will be higher than the mountains after I run off some of this stress!!

I have a 1000 piece puzzle and the table's too small

I need shelving space. I'm going to run out of room. I'm thinking I'm going to store my dishes in the cabinets and then my dry goods. I'll store my appliances in the utility closet and then see what I need to do about my pots and pans.

Anybody got any better ideas?

Since this was Trey's idea, moving and all, I decided I would let him do all the moving, all the packing, all the planning, all the work. I am so bad about following through with that. However, he has packed a few boxes. He didn't tell me until last night that we weren't moving furniture until Saturday, which did me absolutely NO GOOD considering the help I had aquired was only available on Friday. So that's been changed due to what is essentially a lack of communication. I hate moving. I just want you to know that.

Bottom line, as much as I love my husband, I don't trust him to organize my kitchen correctly.

And I can't even cook!