Thursday, May 19, 2011

Part 1

I'm alive.

Who knew I'd ever have an experience in my life where I needed to let people know I was alive?

During the early morning hours of April 27, 2011, I was sleeping hard in my bed while the rain came down. I was woken up only a few short minutes before my alarm went off at 5 am by a loud clap of thunder.

It was dark. It made a chill run down my back.

I jumped out of the bed and simultaneously, the sirens were going off in Tuscaloosa. I reached for my phone and called work. I had to be there. We had been broadcasting on air for days that large super cell storms were expected on Wednesday afternoon. We knew a small front was coming through in the morning but it was expected to be bad. It was the afternoon that concerned the weathermen.

I flipped on the TV and called JT. He was already at the station and told me to stay put. I could come in when the winds calmed down. I pulled on my clothes, brushed my teeth, and was ready for work. I had my school books ready to go. I had a lab final for anatomy at 5 pm. These storms were already a nuisance. I was more worried about whether or not I would be able to take my final and how much more time I had left to study for it.

By 5:30 am, I was able to walk out the door and head to work. Immediately, I was put to task updating weather, updating websites, following the radar, what had JP Dice just said? All seemed to calm down by 8:00 am.

In Alabama during the spring, weather like this always happens. You pray for the best and never expect the worse. Certainly, these weather men are overhyping the afternoon line of storms.

I headed to my 9 am and 10 am classes in the light rain as scheduled. Weather statements had been texted to my phone from UA to be aware of strong storms. I had wished they had cancelled my classes so I could get two extra hours of study in. At 11 am, I went to Gorgas Library on the campus of the University of Alabama. For those unaware of the layout, I was about a half a mile from 15th Street. I spent the rest of the day there prepping for my lab final. I didn't really care about my test, I just needed to pass it. I had already gotten my acceptance letter to the Capstone College of Nursing on the 16th and had an A in the course. I just wanted to keep my A for my GPA.

I was with some classmates in a study room and around 1 pm, we decided we wanted to watch James Spann and have a laugh while we studied. We took a big flat screen television and plugged it up to a macbook. From the macbook, we played the 33/40 ustream. James Spann was already calling out towns, already had the suspenders showing.

On the ustream, there was a chat and C decided he wanted to "play" with some of the people in the chatroom. With all of the fuss on the weather, it was nearly impossible for us to truly focus on identifying reproductive organs on cats, tissue samples, and physiological processes. We were having too much fun watching the television. We were having too much fun debunking this one girl in the chatroom who was saying it was so dark in Tuscaloosa and how scary it looked outside when the sun was out. We typed in "The sun is out. We are on campus. No dark clouds in the sky."

Immediately, responses flowed in to us: "Not the sun!" "The sun is so bad!" "I hope that sun goes away!"

Perplexed we asked why this was so bad. I had no clue. I'm almost 30 and have been through so many storms before, never had I heard the sun is bad.

"The sun heats up the atmosphere and will make the storm stronger."

About this time, I can't remember the exact time on my watch, James Spann started calling out highways in Cullman. I have family in Cullman. My brother. My sister. My nephews. Where are they?

The camera showed this massive storm eating buildings in Cullman. I immediately sent out text messages. "Where are you?" "Are you in a safe place?" All of them were unanswered and time started to slow down.

"C, my family lives there. I can't joke anymore. They're calling out streets where they work and live," I nervously told him. The rest of our friends fell silent, awkwardly giggling to kill the tension every so often. I picked up my phone again and thought long and hard. Finally, I dialed my grandmother's number.

"Meme? Are you watching the TV?"

"No, you're Paw and I are playing on the computer." For the first time in my life, my grandmother was not watching severe weather. That's why she hadn't called yet!

"Well, I don't want to panic you, but a big tornado just ripped through Cullman. It was in downtown. I tried calling Steve, Sonya, and Mary but they aren't answering. If you hear from them, let me know."

"Oh really? I had no idea. Buddy! Turn on the TV, there's weather!" Watching James Spann in the south is like... the President interrupting Flipper. A necessary nuisance. "Where are you? Are ya'll getting weather yet?"

"No, ma'am. The sun is out here. But these storms are supposed to just pop up, so..." I trailed off. No one wants to panic their grandparents, "Well we just don't know what to expect today. I was watching that storm on the TV at the library. We're studying for our final. I'm hoping this weather doesn't postpone my final. We have a beach trip to go on Friday! I can't make up an exam then!"

"Well, you'll do your best I know. Steve is in Decatur today but I'll try to call Mary and Sonya," this brought relief to me even though my sister and sister-in-law and nephews were still quiet in Cullman.

I hung up the phone and we went back to watching. I plugged my phone up to make sure I kept charge. If we did lose power, I knew I'd need as much life as possible until the power company got things working again.

At 3:45 pm, the tornado sirens went off again. The siren is actually on the side of Gorgas Library and it pierced my ears. Well, we're done for the day. We unplugged the computer, packed up, and headed down. On campus the procedure is to move to the lowest level of the building during a warning. All classes are suspended until the warning is over. As we gathered our bags, we jokingly laughed about how this is going to be such a close call on our final. T was in tears that yet another exam would be postponed due to weather. She had worked so hard this semester.

T was nervous about the storms. More than she let on. She had never been in a tornado before. She had no idea what to expect and was apprehensive when I tried to tell her she had nothing to worry about.

We moved to the first floor of Gorgas. The library is a huge, well built building. It's 9 floors total of cement, brick, and books. The first floor is a misleading name because it's not the lowest level of the building. When we came down the stairs to the cafe, we entered to a large crowd of people gathered around another large screen TV with James Spann. The camera this time showed a wall cloud.

My phone started buzzing. My sister Candice wanted to know if I was in a safe place. I have a bad habit of going outside during tornadoes. This sick obsession with physically seeing them and wanting to study them with my eyes. I sent her a message, "I'm on campus. I'm safe." I wasn't worried about me at this point, I was still trying to find my family in Cullman. If truly went to the lowest level of the building, I wouldn't have a signal.

I called Mary again and this time she answered. "Mary where are you?"

She had been asleep when the storm hit. The TV said the hospital in Cullman had been hit, where Mary works. He newborn son was in a house next door to the hospital. OhmiGod my nephew! "Mary have you talked to David?"

"I didn't even know a storm had hit!"

"Well, it hit the hospital. I can't get in touch with Sonya, either. Where's Logan?"

"At my mom's. They have a storm shelter," she sounded like she was holding her breath. "I'll call you back."

The sirens were going off again. It was 4:15. This time it wasn't the tornado sirens but the building sirens. The whining sound was mixed with a voice that read off the weather warnings and what to do.

My phone buzzed again. Here we go. It was my mother. Mum was wanting to know where I was, if I was safe. She turned on James Spann.

I cussed that she was watching. I looked at the TV again and James Spann was saying the tornado was developing west of Tuscaloosa. Piss. Mum is watching this. I typed in my phone my default answer. "Mum, I'm safe. I'm on campus at the library." She responded: Don't go outside! I laughed and showed my friends. "Don't worry. They won't let us go outside." I lied.

I had already been outside to talk to Mary. There was so much commotion. It was loud and hard to hear on the phone. I walked outside again to call my mother. It was a ghost town.

Wind was blowing lose sheets of paper around. Several people were standing under the awning smoking cigarettes nervously. I can't stand the smell of cigarettes. A UAPD car slowly drove past with a bullhorn warning people to get inside. Occasionally, he would blip his sirens to make sure he had our attention. Another chill ran down my spine.

"Mum, hey, I'm safe."

"Where are you, sis? Are you inside?"

"Yeah, I'm safe. I'm at the library. I need this to pass so I can take my exam. I don't want to miss my beach trip if I have to take it Friday."

I chatted with Mum for a minute to calm her worry and headed back in. I stood in the front of the crowd and looked up at the TV in the cafe. We all watched chaotically moving about.

My phone kept buzzing the entire time. I sat down against the wall and plugged my phone up again. My dad called to check on me. This raised a little worry in me because he usually calls after a storm, never before one hits.

At 4:45 pm, the warnings were extended. Double piss. I got what seemed like my 100th message of the last half hour. I looked down and again it was Candice. "You're not outside are you? This thing is huge!"

Huh? "No. I'm inside. I'm in Gorgas." The next series of texts came in so quickly, I couldn't respond fast enough. Mum, Candice, Mum, Candice, Mum, Candice, Sonya - Sonya! She was safe, thank God! I was so relieved to hear from my family in Cullman. I stood up to tell my friends. I turned around to see the television, my phone vibrating non-stop in my hands. A massive tornado was headed to Tuscaloosa.

"Steph, I'm scared for you!"
"Put a book over your head!"
"Where are you?"
"Are you there?"
"DO NOT GO OUTSIDE!"

During all of this chaos, I had been trying to contact A. He had to drive to work that afternoon. I was more worried about him driving in this weather than me being in this weather. I begged him to turn on the ustream feed. To my relief, work had given him the night off. He wouldn't have to drive to Montgomery. After I had seen this storm on the television, I was more worried for him than campus. To me, where I was was invincible.

"Go downstairs and tell Jessie to let you in!" I told him.

He answered, "I'm fine. It's not dark here, babe!"

"I know but it wasn't dark here either! There is a huge tornado in Tuscaloosa headed straight for you!! Get in the bathroom or something!!"

Time continued to slow to a halt.

The sirens went off again. Inside the library, everyone stared at each other a second. It was quiet and all you could hear was James Spann.

"If you know anyone at the University of Alabama, call them immediately and tell them to get to a safe place! This is a huge storm, headed towards the campus." Spann proceeded to name buildings on campus. Mentally, I pleaded with him to stop before he called out Gorgas. "...Gorgas Library..."

Bloody hell, thanks Spann! Immediately my phone, my mum, my sister:

"Are you in the lowest level?"
"Are you inside?"
"Where are you?"
"Sis, get against a wall!"
"It's so big! I'm watching this on the television! He said it's headed straight for you!"

I sent my sister a message, "I wonder if I'll have a car after this."

She responded, "I don't care about your car. I care about your safety right now!"

At a little after 5:00 pm, The power went out. It flickered back on while the cable failed to come back on.

I was so busy trying to respond to the messages that I almost missed the faculty ushering us to the lower level of Gorgas library and it's stairwells. I looked at C. He wasn't saying anything. I looked at T. She was following the flow. I picked up my bag and followed suit. I was hoping T wouldn't be to scared of the storm. I felt like I had lied to her when I told her she had nothing to worry about.

We lined up and filed ourselves down the flight of stairs to the damp basement of the library. It is filled with shelves and shelves of metal bookcases and desks. Mum would hate to know this is my safe place. I grabbed T and C and had them follow me to a spot along the wall of the stairwell, by a plug and around the least amount of metal. I should never in my life have to think about whether or not I'm in the safest place possible. I plugged my phone back up. I was still getting text messages. Candice was panicked when I didn't respond fast enough. Mum was worried I wasn't safe enough. Why did they have to see this on the television?

I looked at C and T and realized neither of them had been in a storm that made us go to this extreme before. I explained to them this was no big deal and what I'd grown up having to do. I tried to rest their worries with stories of gradeschool and having to sit in the hallways for hours waiting out storms. Of course, these were the days before modern technology told us there was a tornado outside of our window. Shortly after we were settled, a faculty member peaked his head out of the stairwell entrance so all of us could here. Students were lined all along the walls, sitting on the metal desks, propped up against the bookshelves, and camping out next to each other in the stairwell.

"OK, if the power goes out, we need you guys to just relax, stay quiet, and stay put. We'll come guide you out with a flashlight. If are to take a direct hit, we need all of you to stay away from the bookshelves and get as close to the wall and stairwell as you can. Find something to cover your head with, too." I couldn't see this person from where I was, but I was glad it was a calm voice giving directions. About 100 of us were in the lower level and I was more worried about panicked students trampling me than a tornado. Unfortunately, his voice wasn't calm enough.

I was still getting text messages. The power went out again and stayed that way.

"Candice, I'm being told what to do, hang on."
"Steph, I'm so scared for you!"
Mum, "Where are you?"
Me, "A! Are you watching? I can't tell you where it is anymore!"
Me, "Candice, here's A's number, tell him to stop watching Friday Night Lights and get safe! I have to start saving battery. I'll text you in a bit!"
Me, "Mum, I have to save my battery."
Mum, "I love you, Sis."

When I got that last text from my mother, I knew this was serious.

At approximately 5:13 pm, The lights went out again and the building shook lightly. Not a bad vibration. It felt like a loud thunder was shaking the earth. And it last longer than thunder should.

Then it was over.

After a few minutes, the calm voice spoke from the stairwell again, "OK, guys, it's passed us we think. We need you guys to stay here for at least ten minutes and then another one is coming. You can stay here for now or go home or seek shelter elsewhere."

My phone started buzzing...again. I was irritated with the phone and I wanted to turn it off.

"Where are you!" My sister was frantic in text.

All of this time happened simultaneously and chaotically. The only clear worry I remember is my car.

"I'm safe. No power. I need to conserve battery so spread the word for me. I don't know if I have a car."

Mum sent me another message. "I'll give your phone a rest now."

"OK, I'm safe. They are keeping us at the library for now. I'll text you when I find a source to charge my phone. Has anyone gotten in touch with A? I gave Candice his number. Please make sure he's safe!"

Before I knew it, I could go upstairs and I really had to use the bathroom! I used the flashlight on my phone to make my way up and walked into a sea of more students on the first floor that had waited out the storm. Many people were on the phone. The impact of the tornado hadn't hit me yet.

My phone buzzed again. It was my aunt. She rarely texts me much less calls. This time she was calling. "Are you safe?"

"Yeah, I'm at the library. I don't know if I have a car, though."

"I can't get Jake." Jake is my cousin who moved here a year and a half ago. He lives near campus and was supposed to be at home when it hit.

"I've been doing a lot of texting. I hear people can't make phonecalls. In fact, I don't know how you got me-" I had tried to call my dad and let him know I was safe but the calls wouldn't go through. I chatted with my aunt a second and asked her to call my dad and grandparents for me and let them know I was safe. To be perfectly honest, this conversation is so foggy. As I was on the phone with her, I had walked outside and around the building to the quad. Trees were everywhere.

When I hung up the phone and walked back in, my phone was already low on juice. I don't even know what time it was anymore. Some of my friends were leaving the library. T had my backpack and I was perplexed at what was going on.

"They're closing the library."

"What?"

"Yeah, we're headed to Ridgecrest!" My sister had sent me more messages about more weather coming through and how we needed to stay put. I was confused.

"Well, we have about an hour until the next line comes through. Can we walk to my car and see if it's still there?" C, T, and I hiked across campus to my car to find out how it was. No busses were running. The wind was eerie and the air was still. Without seeing any devastation, I knew I was in a disaster zone.

While we were still in the library, I had gotten word of all the buildings that had been hit, the massive devastation. All the three of us could think of to do was get to another place of shelter. We loaded T's car and got to the dorms. Then it dawned on me, do I have an apartment??

Immediately I started to field the facebook, using more juice on my phone. We hiked up four flights of stairs and while I watched pictures of devastation pop up on my feed. Twitter was the same. Photos of crumpled buildings were popping up everywhere.

Somehow, UA still had Internet access. T, C, one of C's roommates, and I each took our turns charging our phones on laptop and updating our Facebook and Twitter statuses to let friends and family know where we were and that we were safe. We collectively let out a sigh of relief when we learned that another storm was not headed our way. I was thinking of staying the night at the dorm. My phone was so low I didn't know how I'd get up for work the next day, I didn't know how to contact A and let him know. The laptops would run out of juice soon.

D, C's roommate, started getting videos of the devastation. Then I started to recognize the crumpled buildings I'd already seen in the photos.

Speechless I watched the video as the camera panned the scene. On 15th St, the paneling of McDonald's in the middle of the road, a car was flipped over, power cords were strewn about. Hokaido was leveled, Smoothie King gone. We were hearing that Hobby Lobby, Milo's, Krispy Kreme, Chuck E. Cheese were all gone. Then our friends started posting and texting. Their houses were gone, their dogs were missing, their friends were missing, their lives were in shambles.

As I look back on that afternoon, I realize now that even that night I had no clue how far reaching the devastation was. I had no concept of how close this storm came to wrecking my life.

I finally got one word back from my roommates that they were safe and were leaving the apartment. But I still didn't know if I had one. As dusk began to fall over the city, five of us piled up in C's car to get my to mine. We headed down the road to see if I had an apt. All I could see was it's shadow and that was good enough. I turned my little car around and headed across the bridge.

I was completely stunned and thoughtless. My phone was dead. The complete silence was welcome. I got to A's apartment and he was waiting for me with open arms. I didn't even know then that I needed to cry. I fixed a glass of wine and plugged up my phone. We sat in silence together in front of the television for, what felt like to me, an eternity.

What just happened? The videos of the storm started to pop up. The monster in action. I was the YouTube clips and wanted to throw up. This storm was so close to taking my job, my school, my home, my life. Why didn't it? We went to bed and I had dreams of being chased by tornadoes. I woke up and started into work for my 6 am start time as usual. The sun was just starting to rise over the city. I had no idea what to expect.

I called Mum on the way in to touch base. I told her how I'd spent my night and that I didn't know if I had an apartment yet. That was notched on my "to-do" list for the day. Get stuff for the beach. "Mum, I hear it's bad. I've seen some video. We got leveled!"

"I'm so glad you're OK."

While I was on the phone with her, I got closer to work and began to see for myself some of the devastation. Cars were crushed and upside down on the highway. Towers were crumpled on hillsides. Buildings had been reduced to pillars. Then I realized, I was at my exit, but I couldn't recognize it.

"Oh my God, Mum! It's all gone!!"

"What, Sis?"

"This city! It's all gone!!" I sat on my phone in the parking lot of the radio station for a minute and we weeped together. It was the closest I was going to be able to get to her for four more days.

When we hung up, I dried my eyes and walked into the Round Building. We call it that not because it's titled that, but, well... it's round and wooden and old and faithful. I walked in the door and started an experience that has changed me and my perception of what happened in Tuscaloosa.

When I started work on April 28, 2011, I had no idea that what I was about to be apart of was going to be the best experience of my life.

....tbc

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