Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Days go by

My drive in to work every day requires me to drive through damage from the storm. I believe I have mentioned this in a previous post. There is literally no route from my job that I can take without seeing devastation. I have to admit that it's kind of numbing to see it everyday and that seems to make everything a little bit more bearable, a bit like a seasoned doctor or nurse who sees blood everyday or sticks a needle in a vein. It's becoming normal.

I don't know if it's the stress from school, because upper division at the Capstone College of Nursing is intense, or if it's just part of the grieving process, but recently, seeing the same things I've seen everyday have stirred up some of the first identifiable emotions I've had from the storm; the shock, the heaviness in my stomach, the sadness. The sadness is always there, numb or not. But it's a rollercoaster ride and I guess right now, I'm going up a hill.

I realized today they are working on Rosedale. I don't know what words to describe because you can't tear down what's already torn down. It's more like, consolidating the piles of rubble.

Outside of Rosedale Court, April 28, 2011
It's no longer mounds of brick and wood in the now fenced in remains. It's larger mounds. They are starting to clean it up. And while I thought that it would maybe be a relief to see that debris finally disappear, I have to admit that it took my breath away.

I realized this morning that it's the change that's getting to me. It's so much change in so little time. I'm still having to learn the streets all over again because nothing is recognizable along many roads. As soon as I have begun to learn new landmarks, they change again.

This says so much to the hard-working men and women out in this 1o0 degree heat, every day, picking up the pieces of our lives and throwing them away as we all move on. The miracle that our spirits are still so high in Tuscaloosa bodes so well for our future and despite the stinging pain that finds it way up from time to time, it's going to be exciting to see what the future holds for this resilient town.

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